Though rescuers can be both men and women, the book I wrote on the subject, was primarily for women.
So, you might ask, what does the rescuer do and feel in her relationships?
Thus, underneath all of these behaviors lie unconscious motives that serve to keep him safe in his comfort zone.
If we filled a fountain with a quarter for every woman who’s loved and tried to save a broken man, we could probably fill Niagara Falls.
Relationships and breakups are difficult for either party, and one person usually ends up with much deeper cuts and scars.
Newsflash: This may be the person you are now dating.
Even though people move on and hope their previous experiences won't affect future relationships, they somehow always do.
I’d say I was into them and I was pretty convincing, but a day later, I’d be annoyed and irritable and just want to be alone or with guy friends because I thought they were “easier.” Deep down, men like this are very ambivalent about being close with a woman for a long period of time.
The older a man gets, the more he hates this about himself, and he often stays stuck by staying in the relationship, but giving very little.
But when those same "in love" people take off their rose colored glasses, they realize the person they thought was Mr. ("He's so good-looking," or "What a gorgeous woman! If a person is serious about finding an emotionally available person for a committed partnership, there are whole categories of people who should be avoided: people living in another state, those who are still married or in love with someone else, and people with addictions - be it workaholics or drug addicts.
The "booby prize" in life is trying to understand or change the behavior of an emotionally unavailable person.